Wednesday, April 24, 2013

That Precious Little White Healthy Baby

The initial adoption proceedings were held on Friday. The three of us drove home so happy and content. We were amazed at our new little son. Uncertain how this was God's plan but happily adding this little man to our family. Serenity and Gabriel were in love with baby boy. Rich had to fly back on Sunday right after services. WHen we brought our brand spanking new baby to church that morning everyone was so happy for us. One friend and then another was amazed at how our new baby looked so much like his new Daddy.

Rich flew back that afternoon and we started to settle into a new routine. In only 2 months hubby would be back from the school he was attending and we would be sent to new duty station. Military moves are just part of the life we were leading so I really thought nothing of it.

I took baby to the pediatrician on base and he was declared a real dandy. All we had for records was a scrap of paper with his Apgar scores on it and the last time he had had a bottle. The doctor didn't see any problems so we happily went home. Things changed the morning of his 6 week appointment.

An hour before the appointment I was sitting in the rocking chair with him. I wanted to feed him before we went for his check up.  All at once he vomited so hard that it shot across the room. Within just a couple of minutes he was comatose. Once at the hospital he was immediately admitted to the hospital with an almost certain diagnosis of spinal meningitis.  We had gone from a healthy baby boy to a very sick little one in the blink of an eye.  That was only the beginning of the nightmare.

We were at the hospital for three days. Once the spinal fluid came out clear they gave up looking. The actual test came back and was filed in his records without anyone noticing what the real problem was. It would take a year to find that piece of paper again.  I was so frustrated with the hospital. Because they had been so sure he had meningitis they stopped looking when it wasn't. That mistake would haunt us for years.

Baby was released from the hospital still sick but the hospital thought he just needed rest and he would be fine. Rich came home, the military packed us up and we moved from Illinois to California. We drove all that way with a baby that became sicker with each mile. He didn't cry, he screamed. This ear piercing high tone scream with every bump in the road, with every sound that was made, he screamed.

I remember driving through Las Vegas and deciding we just had to get to the new base as fast as we could so I held him. I know, we could have all died in a car accident but we were desperate. I tried to soothe him as much as I could. We finally put him on the floor between my legs and he finally slept.

I will never forget that ride as long as I live. We were sick with worry. I KNEW there was something really wrong with him, and we both felt so helpless. We got to base in the middle of the night and fell into the bed.

I got an appointment with the pediatric clinic the next day. Baby was now 2 months old and could do nothing a 2 month old could do. He could not hold up his head, he screamed at the slightest movement and was only quiet the first 20-30 minutes after a feeding. All muscle tone was gone. Holding him was like holding a rag doll.

What the pediatrician told me next would make my blood boil.

The journey continues, till next time.

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the ground each morning Satan says, "Oh crud, she's up".

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